Be firm – say no, in a firm and calm tone (and as unemotionally as possible), without saying, “I’m sorry” which will weaken your stand.

Explain - say no, followed by an upfront explanation of what you are feeling, or what you are willing or prepared to do to help.

Body language counts - be aware of your body language. Ensure that you don’t come across in either a passive or aggressive manner. Remember that emotions that aren’t displayed in words, can often be ‘seen’ through your nonverbal behaviour.

Offer alternatives - say no, and then give the person different options or alternatives, such as:

o “I cannot do this now; however, I can do it when I have finished this task, which will be in one hour”

o “I don’t have time to do that today, but I could help you out first thing tomorrow morning”

Stay scripted – stick to your ‘scripted’ response. This way of saying no involves using a one-sentence ‘knock-back’ statement and persistently repeating it as often as necessary. Select a concise, one-sentence statement and repeat it no matter what the other person says or does. This is useful when dealing with aggressive or manipulative behaviour and people who ‘won’t take no for an answer.

Natural No - use the ‘no’ that’s natural to you. For example, you may well have developed your own particular style of saying no based on past experiences and through your personality. If this is the case, then use it!